Bonjour! Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant? Aujourd’hui, un petit article sur l’attaque de Pearl Harbor, comme le port a été attaqué le 07/12/1941 – il y a 70 ans. Enjoy !!

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne

It was December 7, 1941 — an ordinary Sunday morning in Honolulu, Hawai’i. Just before 8:00 a.m., amidst peace and quiet and without warning, Japanese aircraft filled the skies and attacked Pearl Harbor and other military bases on the island of O’ahu. Thousands of people were killed and the United States plunged into World War II. Why did the Japanese attack Pearl Harbor? Were there warning signs? Why were so many killed? In the 1930′s, Japan was overcrowded and needed more living space for its population of over 60 million people. The world was in an economic depression and Japan’s industries were in trouble. They needed natural resources such as steel, oil, and rubber.

They also needed farmland to grow food. To solve Japan’s problems, Japanese military extremists agreed that Japan needed to expand and take over countries like China to gain needed resources. In 1931, Japan invaded and conquered Manchuria, a region in northern China. Six years later Japan launched a full scale attack on China. Japan was quickly becoming a great military power and planned to control all of Asia. Although alarmed by this action, neither the United States nor any other nation with interests in the Far East was willing to use military force to stop the Japanese expansion. The American military was well aware that a surprise attack on Hawai’i was possible and they thought they were prepared. Army fighters at Wheeler Air Field guarded the sky while bombers at Hickam Field stood ready to strike an enemy fleet long before it could reach attack position. Military leaders believed that the greatest danger was not air attack but saboteurs. To make their aircraft easier to guard, they were parked wing-tip to wing-tip in the middle of the airfield.

On the morning of December 7, 1941, at 6:15 a.m., the first wave of 184 Japanese planes took off from the Japanese aircraft carriers. At 6:30 a.m., the destroyer Ward sighted a submarine in restricted waters off of Pearl Harbor and opened fire. She sank one of the 2-man midget submarines that were part of the Japanese attack force. Ward radioed naval headquarters, “We have attacked, fired upon, and dropped depth charges on a submarine operating in defensive sea area.” Minutes later, radar operators on the north coast of the island detected a large flight of incoming planes and notified the information center at Fort Shafter. The officer on duty there assumed that they were the American B-17 bombers due in that day from California. The radar had actually detected the Japanese strike force. At 7:55 a.m., the code word, “Tora! Tora! Tora!” was shouted over the radio and waves of Japanese fighters and bombers began to swarm over the island — their main target, Pearl Harbor. One hundred forty-five vessels of all kinds were docked at Pearl Harbor, from small boats to battleships.

The Japanese hoped that United States aircraft carriers were also in port at the time of the attack but they weren’t — the carriers Lexington and Enterprise were out at sea delivering aircraft to Wake and Midway Islands. The main targets then became the battleships that were lined up at Ford Island in the middle of Pearl Harbor — “Battleship Row”. The Japanese attack ended at 9:45 a.m. In just one hour and forty-five minutes, a horrifying scene of death and destruction covered the island. Most of the ships of the United States Pacific Fleet were sunk or damaged. More than 2,300 army, navy, air force, and marine corps personnel were killed, 960 were missing, and over 1,200 were wounded. Of the 394 aircraft on the island, 188 of the army and navy aircraft had been completely destroyed and over 150 were severely damaged. The fires on the military bases and on the damaged ships continued to burn for many days.

The rescue of the hundreds of men trapped inside their sunken ships went on day and night until all hope was gone. Of the 392 Japanese aircraft that had attacked Pearl Harbor, 324 returned to their carriers. A few had been lost in takeoff or landing while the others had been shot down by United States aircraft or anti-aircraft fire. Less than 60 Japanese airmen lost their lives. One Japanese squadron leader had deliberately crashed his burning plane into a hangar at an airfield. This was known as a kamikaze, or “divine wind,” suicide attack. Japan officially declared war on the United States at 11:40 a.m., December 7,1941, four hours after the attack on Pearl Harbor had started. Once the news of the attack on Pearl Harbor spread throughout the United States, the feelings of most Americans changed. Previously, many had thought that the war in Europe had nothing to do with them. They also thought that the Japanese wouldn’t attack the big and powerful United States. But on the afternoon of December 7, many Americans began to shout, “Remember Pearl Harbor!” and they were ready to go to war. The attack on Pearl Harbor did something the Japanese government did not plan on — unite America. Many Americans now began to look at Japanese Americans differently.

Japanese Americans whose families had lived in America for generations and were loyal American citizens were thought of as possible enemies. Within just a few weeks, plans were being made to send all Japanese Americans to internment camps where most of them would have to live until the war was over. America’s pride took a blow when Pearl Harbor was attacked. However, Admiral Chester W. Nimitz, commander of the Pacific Naval force, said that the Japanese made one mistake that day. They attacked only once. A second and even a third raid on Pearl Harbor would have destroyed the entire United States naval power in the Pacific. Although eight battleships were lost or damaged during the attack, the war was not going to be won by battleships. It was going to be fought and won in the air. The fact that no United States Navy aircraft carriers were destroyed that day was crucial. New ones would have cost millions of dollars and taken years to build and by that time, the United States probably would have lost the war. Of equal importance, many important facilities were not damaged that day: the gasoline storage tanks, ammunition dumps, naval repair shops, and dry docks. On Monday, December 8, 1941, President Franklin D. Roosevelt called together the nation’s senators and congressmen. He asked them to declare war on Japan for an “unprovoken and dastardly attack.”

Although most Americans felt they should also declare war on Germany and Italy, Roosevelt did not, since there had been no direct attack on the United States by those two nations. The problem was solved, however, when Adolf Hitler of Germany and Benito Mussolini of Italy both declared war on the United States a few days later. Plans were being made to fight a war the United States had not wanted. Each year on December 7th, people throughout the country remember the day that will live in infamy – - – the bombing of Pearl Harbor. On that day, the survivors and the thousands whose lives were cut short on December 7, 1941 are honored and memorialized.

Bonjour!

Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant?
Aujourd’hui… quelles qualités un homme doit il posséder pour être “intéressant sur le long terme” .

Enjoy !!

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais

Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne, Anglais à Aulnay sous Bois

5 things that make a man a keeper

His glance may make you blush hard enough to burn your cheeks, but does he deserve your long-term attention? You know already that lust and love are not the same thing, but you may not know that love and keepability aren’t the same either. Love isn’t all you need.

For example, it’s not enough for him to treat you like a queen – a keeper treats himself well, too. And he certainly doesn’t make you such a priority that he has no time left for his friends. Read on to find out why optimism is more marriagable than a nice car.


1. He’s happy

Not in the laugh-a-minute sense, though it’s important that you can make each other laugh. A happy man is a man who is comfortable in his skin, at peace with his baggage and has a positive outlook. He is happy when he’s around you, but he doesn’t need to be around you to be happy.

Of course he will have unhappy days, weeks or even months, as a response to events in his life. Just as you do. But he never quite loses his positivity. He isn’t so optimistic that he’s deluded, but his default state is one of contentment with his life.

Why is it so important? Because an unhappy man will eventually make you an unhappy woman. Being around negative people is draining and contagious. Unfortunately, many women are drawn to men who need “fixing” or looking after, and they end up doing all the giving and none of the getting. You can’t fix a man; he has to fix himself. If you want to help an unhappy man, be his friend but don’t be his emotional nursemaid.

2. He looks after himself

While we’re on the subject of maids, make sure that you never end up as a man’s skivvy or secretary. Gone are the days when men went from being looked after by their mothers to being looked after by their wives, who in turn were “looked after” financially. Good, because co-dependency is not a good basis for a relationship.

True independence is not about being an eternal bachelor, but about being a grown-up. A keeper does his own laundry and doesn’t empty his wallet into the local pub on pay day. When problems arise in his life he handles them with maturity, and he’s not afraid to ask for help when he needs it.


3. He’s not afraid to express his feelings

Google “men and feelings” and you’ll get a thousand articles telling you that men do not talk about emotions, ever. Clearly, the people who wrote these articles have not yet met a keeper. Real men certainly do talk about their feelings – and they’re not afraid to talk about yours, either.

You can’t base a relationship on guesswork. You have to know where you stand, and that means being with someone who doesn’t shrink away from saying “I want to be with you,” or “I love you.” More important still, sharing feelings is an expression of trust. A man who can’t or won’t explain what’s going on in his head is a man who’s keeping something from you, consciously or not.

4. He treats his friends and family well

If you’re with a man who’s stopped seeing his friends because he wants to be with you all the time, alarm bells should ring. Partly because he’s suffocating your relationship, but mainly because he’s missing a loyalty gene. If he’s fickle enough to drop his friends for you, he’s definitely fickle enough to drop you.

A true keeper will want to show you off to his friends and family, but he’ll also want to spend time with them. You are two individuals whose friends were around long before you met each other. Give each other space you maintain those friendships, and value a man who treats his loved ones with respect and loyalty.

5. He texts you on the way home

This is a small but perfectly formed clue to a man’s keepability. He won’t insist that you call him when you get home (too pushy) – instead he’ll drop you a quick thank-you text after you part. It’s a thoughtful and courteous gesture from someone who wants to make you smile. That’s the sort of man you want to keep.

Bonjour!

 

Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant?

Comme dans une semaine c’est Thanksgiving (dernier jeudi de novembre) voici un petit historique de cette fête. Il y a un petit résumé en français pour les plus débutants.

Enjoy !!

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais

Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne, Anglais à Aulnay sous BoisThe story of the first Thanksgiving

Around four hundred years ago many people in England were unhappy because their King would not let them pray to
God as they liked. The King said they must use the same prayers as HE did and if they refused they were persecuted,
imprisoned or even killed.
These Englishmen left their homes (in Plymouth) and went far away to a country called Holland. In Holland they were happy but they were very poor. Then when the children began to grow they became less godfearing and did not want to pray any more.
After much talking and thinking these English people decided to embark on a pilgrimage to the new world: AMERICA.
They set out in  a small ship called the Mayflower to take them across the sea. There were about one hundred people
on board the tiny ship. It was crowded, cold and uncomfortable. The sea was rough. They spent two months sailing across the Atlantic Ocean.
At last the Mayflower came in sight of land. The month was November and it was cold. There was nothing to be
seen but snow, rocks and hard bare ground. They were tired and cold from their long journey, and hungry too.
No one had enough food to eat. Many of them became sick and by springtime almost half of the people had died.

In spring the sun shone brightly, the snow melted and the leaves and flowers began to emerge. Some friendly
Indians had visited the Pilgrims during the winter. One of the kindly Indians was named Squanto. He stayed with the
Pilgrims and taught them how to plant their corn, peas, wheat and barley. The summer came and the days were long
and bright. The pilgrim children were very happy in their new home on Plymouth Rock.     
       When it was autumn the fathers gathered the barley, wheat and corn that they had planted and found that it had
grown so well that they would have quite enough for the long winter that was coming.
Let us thank God for everything, they said. Then they decided to have a big thanksgiving party and invited the
friendly Indians.
They prepared wild duck and geese and great wild turkeys. There was deer meat, bread and cakes.
They had fish and clams from the sea nearby. The friendly Indians all came with their chief. They were dressed in deerskins
and some of them had wild-cat fur skins hanging on their arms. Their long black hair fell loose on their
shoulders and was trimmed with feathers or fox tails.
Before they ate the Pilgrims and the Indians thanked God together for all his goodness.
And so the story goes of the first Thanksgiving celebrated in Plymouth colony nearly four hundred years ago.
As you sit down with your friends and family this Thanksgiving remember this original tale and give thanks for all
God’s abundant blessings.

 

Bonjour!

 

Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant?

Aujourd’hui, des proverbes avec leurs significations.

 

Have fun !

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais

Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne, Anglais à Aulnay sous Bois

No matter how simple precious gems of wisdom maybe, yet they have depth of actual learning that most oversee. This is because they are taken aback by the mere string of words. However, where the real essence is concerned, it is what exists between each word. The space between the words is where the meaning is hidden. On meditating on proverbs can one actually learn the actual famous proverbs meanings and weave it into their lives…

Here is a collection of some famous proverbs along with their meanings :

A poor workman blames his tools.
Meaning : A person who blames other’s for his failures.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Meaning : Be grateful for whatever you have.

Action speaks louder than words:
Meaning : One should implement his actions, rather than keep talking about them.

A Jack of all trades is a master of none.
Meaning : One should excel in one skill rather than dabbling in too many.

A Penny saved is a Penny earned.
Meaning : One must understand the importance of saving money.

A merry heart makes a long life.
Meaning : Being happy brings good health.

A stitch in time saves nine.
Meaning : One should avoid procrastinating.

A little learning is a dangerous thing.
Meaning : One should have full knowledge, rather than spreading incomplete information.

A person is known by the company he keeps.
Meaning : One is judged according to the friends he has.

As you sow, so shall you reap.
Meaning : As you do to others, the same comes back to you.

All that glitters is not gold.
Meaning : One should not be led by appearance.

Old is gold.
Meaning : The past has important lessons in our present.

 

 

Bonjour!

 

Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant?

Aujourd’hui, des publicités très surprenantes et amusantes.

 

Have fun !

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais

Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne, Anglais à Aulnay sous Bois

The World’s Funniest Real Ads

Believe it or not, these ads actually found their way into newspapers all over the world:

Braille dictionary for sale. Must see to appreciate.

FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.

Help wanted, singer for rock band. Must be female or male.

Help wanted, adult or mature teenager to baby-sit. One dollar an hour.

Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.

Wanted, man to take care of cows that does not smoke or drink.

Three-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.

Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.

Tired of working for only $9.75 per hour? We offer profit sharing and flexible hours. Starting pay: $7 — $9 per hour.

Our sofa seats the whole mob and it’s made of 100% Italian leather.

Full sized mattress. 20 year warranty. Like New. Slight urine smell.

Joining nudist colony! Must sell washer and dryer $300.

Open house body shapers toning salon free coffee and donuts

Found: dirty white dog. Looks like a rat… been out while. Better be reward.

ALZHEIMER’S CENTER PREPARES FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER.

Free Yorkshire Terrier: 8 years old. Hateful little dog.

Free puppies: ½ cocker spaniel, ½ sneaky neighbor’s dog.

Free puppies: part German Shepherd, part stupid dog.

German Shepherd, 85 lbs. Neutered. Speaks German. Free.

Snow Blower for sale…only used on snowy days.

Cows, calves never bred…also 1 gay bull for sale.

Nice Parachute – Never opened. Used once.

1 man, 7 women hot tub. $850/offer.

Shakespeare’s Pizza. Free chopsticks.

Bonjour!

Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant?

Aujourd’hui, deux nursery rhymes (comptines) et leurs origines. Celles ci dessous sont très connues, un peu comme nos chansons « frère Jacques » et « Fais dodo Cola mon petit frère ».  Ce qui est très intéressant également est le contenu historique de ces chansons.

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais

Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne, Anglais à Aulnay sous Bois

Rock a bye baby: lyrics

Rock a bye baby on the tree top,
When the wind blows the cradle will rock,
When the bough breaks the cradle will fall,
And down will come baby, cradle and all.

Origins in American history
The words and lyrics to this nursery rhyme are reputed to reflect the observations of a young pilgrim boy in America who had seen Native Indian mothers suspend a birch bark cradle from the branches of a tree enabling the wind to rock the cradle and the child to sleep. The rhyme also hold a warning on the choice of bough!

Twinkle twinkle little star: lyrics

Twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are?
Up above the world so high , like a diamond in the sky
When the blazing sun is gone, when he nothing shines upon,
Then you show your little light, twinkle, twinkle all the night.
Then the traveller in the dark, thanks you for your tiny spark,
He could not see which way to go, if you did not twinkle so.
In the dark blue sky you keep, and often through my curtains peep,
For you never shut your eye, ’till the sun is in the sky.
As your bright and tiny spark lights the traveller in the dark,
Though I know not what you are – twinkle, twinkle little star.

Nursery rhyme imagery
The words and lyrics of this beautiful nursery rhyme is more like a poem and as such makes good use of the simile ‘ like a diamond in the sky’ . The authors were sisters Ann and Jane Taylor. The first publication date was 1806. The lyrics  draw a comparison of the twinkling of the star to the shutting or blinking of the eye providing a perfect illustration of clever imagery and excellent use
of the English language.

 

Bonjour!

 

Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant?

Aujourd’hui, un texte parlant des « originalités » de la langue anglaise. ENJOY!

A noter : ox = un bœuf

Fowl = volaille

Booth = cabine

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais

Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne, Anglais à Aulnay sous Bois

The Funny English Language

  No wonder the English language is so very difficult to learn.
I sometimes wonder how we manage to communicate at all!

We’ll begin with a box and the plural is boxes.
But the plural of ox should be oxen, not oxes.

The one fowl is a goose but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may found a lone mouse or a whole set of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn’t the plural of pan be called pen?

If I speak of a foot and you show me your feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why should not the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural wouldn’t be hose.
And the plural of cat is cats and not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say Mother, we never say Methren,

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine she, shis and shim,

So English, I fancy you will all agree,
Is the funniest language you ever did see.

 

Bonjour!

 

Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant?

Aujourd’hui, des blagues plutôt faciles à comprendre, et des devinettes.

ENJOY!

 

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais

Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne, Anglais à Aulnay sous Bois

 
Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.

The teacher says, “Why are you arguing?”

One boy answers, “We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie.”

“You should be ashamed of yourselves,” said the teacher, “When I was your age I didn’t even know what a lie was.”

The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.

The teacher to a student: Conjugate the verb “to walk” in simple present.
The student: I walk. You walk ….
The teacher interrupts him: Quicker please.
The student: I run. You run .
Boy: Hey,  I’ve got two words to say.
Girl: What ???
Boy: I LOVE U…
Girl: Huh… Isn’t that 3 words ???
Boy: No, because (U) And (I) Are One..!
Here’s the funny scenario.
1. It all began with an iPhone .. my son was celebrating his 16th birthday, so I got him an iPhone. He just loved it. Who wouldn’t?
2. Then, my birthday came along, and my wife made me very happy when she got me an iPad.
3. Then it was time for our daughter’s birthday, so I got her an iPod Touch.
4. Last but not least, it was time for my Wife’s birthday. So I got her an iRon.

 

 

 

Q: What do you get if Batman and Robin get smashed by a steam roller?
A: Flatman and ribbon.

Q: When is a car not a car?
A: When it turns into a garage.

Q: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?
A: He wanted to win the No-bell prize.

Q: Why did the atoms cross the road?
A: It was time to split!

Q: What do you do when your chair breaks?
A: Call a Chairman.

Q: Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide?
A: Because it’s too cold out tide!

Q: What kind of car does Luke Skywalker drive?
A: a Toy-yoda.

 

‘I have a gift for you. A centipede. It can do EVERYTHING.’

“I can’t imagine a centipede doing everything, but OK… I’ll try a centipede.”

He goes home and says to the centipede, “Clean the kitchen.”

Half an hour later, he walks into the kitchen and it’s spotless!

All the dishes have been washed, dried, and put away, the counter-tops are cleaned and the floor is waxed.  

The man is absolutely amazed. He says to the centipede, “Clean the living room.”

Half an hour later, the living look is perfect.

The carpet has been vacuumed, plants watered and the furniture has been cleaned and dusted.

The man thinks to himself, “This is the most  amazing thing I’ve ever seen.

This really is a pet that can do everything!”

So he says to the centipede, “Get your shoes on and run down to the corner shop and get me a newspaper.”

The  centipede walks out the door.

Ten minutes later, no centipede.

Twenty minutes later, no centipede.

Thirty minutes  later… no centipede.

By this point the man is wondering what’s going on.

The centipede should have been back in a  couple of minutes.

An hour later – still no centipede!

The man is trying to think what could have happened.

Did the  centipede run away? Did it get run over by a car?

Bit worried, he goes to the front door, opens it … and there’s the centipede sitting right outside.

The man says, “Hey – I sent you to the corner shop an hour ago to get me a newspaper.  What’s the matter!?”

The centipede says, “I’m goin’! I’m goin’! I’m just puttin’ on my shoes!”

 

Bonjour!

 

Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant?

Aujourd’hui, des citations sur les hommes.

ENJOY!

 

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais

Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne, Anglais à Aulnay sous Bois

 

Meaningful Quotes about Men

It is an error to suppose that a man belongs to himself. No man does. He belongs to his wife, or his children, or his relations, or to his creditors, or to society in some form or other.—G.A. Sala.

Man is an animal that cooks his victuals.—Burke.

Men aren’t the way they are because they want to drive women crazy; they’ve been trained to be that way for thousands of years. And that training makes it very difficult for men to be intimate.
Barbara de Angelis

How poor, how rich, how abject, how august,
How complicate, how wonderful, is man!
—Young.

He who loses wealth loses much; he who loses a friend loses more; but he that loses his courage loses all.—Cervantes.

Make yourself an honest man, and then you may be sure that there is one rascal less in the world.—Carlyle.

A good man is kinder to his enemy than bad men are to their friends.—Bishop Hall.

An obstinate man does not hold opinions, but they hold him.—Pope.

Man that is born of woman is of few days, and full of trouble.—Job 14:1.

A man may twist as he pleases, and do what he pleases, but he inevitably comes back to the track to which nature has destined him.—Goethe.

Men may rise on stepping-stones of their dead selves to higher things.—Tennyson.

The record of life runs thus: Man creeps into childhood,—bounds into youth,—sobers into manhood,—softens into age,—totters into second childhood, and slumbers into the cradle prepared for him. – Henry Giles.

He is the whole encyclopædia of facts. The creation of a thousand forests is in one acorn; and Egypt, Greece, Rome, Gaul, Britain, America, lie folded already in the first man.—Emerson.

Man is an animal that makes bargains; no other animal does this,—one dog does not change a bone with another.—Adam Smith.

 

Bonjour!

 

Vous avez envie d’améliorer votre anglais en vous amusant?

Aujourd’hui, des citations sur les femmes. Et demain ce sera sur les hommes.

ENJOY!

 

www.anglaisfacile77.fr

Formations d’anglais pour enfants, adolescents et adultes en Seine et Marne (77), en Seine Saint Denis (93) et Val de Marne (94), préparation au TOEIC, DIF Anglais

Anglais à Courtry, Anglais à Le Pin, Anglais à Chelles, Anglais à Villeparisis, Anglais à Torcy, Anglais à Gagny, Anglais à Bussy Saint Georges, Anglais à Coubron, Anglais à Pomponne, Anglais à Vaujours, Anglais à Marne la Vallée, Anglais à Chessy, Anglais à Lagny sur Marne, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Croissy Beaubourg, Anglais à Lognes, Anglais à Noisiel, Anglais à Noisy le Grand, Anglais à Montfermeil, Anglais à Bry sur Marne, Anglais à Aulnay sous Bois

 

Meaningful Quotes about Women

A woman is more considerate in affairs of love than a man; because love is more the study and business of her life.—Washington Irving.

Women are nothing but machines for producing children.
Napoleon Bonaparte

Women, don’t get a tattoo. That butterfly looks great on your breast when you’re twenty or thirty, but when you get to seventy, it stretches into a condor.
Billy Elmer

What’s a table richly spread,
Without a woman at its head?
—T. Wharton.

American ladies are known abroad for two distinguishing traits (besides, possibly, their beauty and self-reliance), and these are their ill-health and their extravagant devotion to dress.—Abba Goold Woolson.

To feel, to love, to suffer, to devote herself will always be the text of the life of women.—Balzac.

All a woman has to do in this world is contained within the duties of a daughter, a sister, a wife and a mother.—Steele.

I have always said it—nature meant to make woman its master-piece.—Lessing.

Nature has given women two painful but heavenly gifts, which distinguish them, and often raise them above human nature,—compassion and enthusiasm. By compassion, they devote themselves; by enthusiasm they exalt themselves.—Lamartine.

The brain women never interest us like the heart women; white roses please less than red.—Holmes.


 

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